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Betrayed

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Posts: 3
Reply with quote  #1 
I never heard of huffing duster until 5 weeks ago. My best friend / boyfriend started using. Steve is an alcoholic . For over a year I never left his side. Going through this with him took all of me. I was thrown up on, peed on & fell on so many times that I lost count. I fed him just to make sure he ate something, but it was always very little. I was there when he detoxed on his own. There were times I felt he was going to die. We cried, we prayed. Steve has been in treatment centers & in jail. He thanks me and calls me his angel for saving his life. He was released into sobriety court this last February. That is the only reason he is not drinking. This last time in jail he learned how to get around sobriety court by huffing, as it is not detected.
Again, I've been there by his side as he "rebuilt" his life. Steve is now living in a house, has a restricted license, back to work (he is self employed), and "seems" to have it all together. I began finding cans of duster around his house One day I found acetone, aerosol paint, an empty can with nasty liquid in it & napkins in his nightstand. This was the beginning of a new addiction. I have even seen him hallucinating. And he is now into porn and weird sexual ideas. He told me he was not going to do it again. I continued to find cans of duster, even in his vehicle. In such a short time he has changed into someone I do not like or even know anymore. He no longer has emotions, feelings, compassion nor empathy for anyone, including me, "his angel." He now wants to be alone and will lie just to be alone. A week ago he basically threw me aside like a bag of trash. I am devastated. We do not see each other nor do we talk. I do text him everyday anxiously waiting for a reply so I know that he is still alive. I worry about him constantly. I can't sleep. And I worry about him driving when huffing.
Steve was the kindest, gentlest, most compassionate man I had ever met. He is the complete opposite now. We had formed a bond that we both said could never be broken no matter what direction our lives took.
I told his family and his two best friends when I found out how bad huffing really is. They are going to talk to him.
Does huffing duster change a person that drastically in such a short time? Please give me advice. I don't know what to do anymore. He is now cold, mean & irritable. I want to just walk away as I now feel so used and betrayed. I can't do this again. But I can't stop the worry.
RominaSmith

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Reply with quote  #2 
As a huffing addict I can tell you the high that you receive from huffing whatever aerosol is almost the same as doing meth. It comes with hallucinations, its extremely addictive, the high hits you suddenly, and im pretty sure the reason he is so irritable is because of the nausea you get after it wears off the only thing that helps is just huffing one more time. I've been there it releases stress and pain and makes you blackout almost instantly. Im sorry but yes it does change a person.
Betrayed

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Reply with quote  #3 
Thank you for some insight Romina. I don't see Steve as often anymore, I had to put some distance there as this is all very hard for me. I know he is still huffing because of sores around his mouth and one time he had what looked to be frostbite (size of a nickel ) above his lip. He's always rubbing his nose and like itching it??
I know he's using an ecig now with a large refillable tank?? I know it can't be good because he keeps it hidden & he doesn't use it around anyone. Do you know what that can be filled with?
Fifik

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Reply with quote  #4 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Betrayed
Thank you for some insight Romina. I don't see Steve as often anymore, I had to put some distance there as this is all very hard for me. I know he is still huffing because of sores around his mouth and one time he had what looked to be frostbite (size of a nickel ) above his lip. He's always rubbing his nose and like itching it??
I know he's using an ecig now with a large refillable tank?? I know it can't be good because he keeps it hidden & he doesn't use it around anyone. Do you know what that can be filled with?



About 8 yrs ago I huffed dust off, and not just a small inhale but I would take in as much as could and hold my breath. It only lasted 2 months before I became terrified and I knew the ONLY way for me to stop (because I for the life of me do not know how to ask for help) was to be caught in the act, by my extremely terrifying father, so when heard my dad come inside I yelled for him to "come here, quick!" And inhaled a large amount. When I started coming to out of my "second long crazy dream" (blackout) I was crouched down with my head between my knees and my dad said "I've been pounding on your door for almost a minute, I came thru ur closet finally. Jesus what kind of medication did they put you on?" (I had been in a psych ward right before I started huffing.) And I got scared, like really scared of what my dad would do, so I changed my mimd, I didn't want to be caught, so I hoped so hard that he wouldn't look down at his feet. He saw the can and threw me across the room onto my bed and actually balled up a fist and pulled back a little, but stopped himself. That would've been his first time hitting me. THAT scared me, then my dad told me while crying (which he does NOT cry) that he thought they had me on something like Thorazine. He said I was so out of it I was lulling my head and saying inaudible slurred words and drooling, and that those fun "dreams" I was having were actually mini comas. I changed a lot in two months, like, a whole lot. And if it hadn't been for my dad, someone who loves me, I would've ended up dead.

The real Steve is still in there, just do as much is as you can, without letting it hurt you, to let him know he's not alone and u love him. As for the Exit, the only reason to keep THAT hidden is if it has a hardcore synthetic drug in the vapor. I'm really sorry you're going thru all this, both of you
I wish u the best of luck!
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